i am finding

that the more i am pushed to my limits, the more i am learning.

it's incredible how much stronger i am than even a year ago. i've endured heartache and crazy pain, and i've learned how to make unpleasant but holy choices. i've grown in my confidence, not only in who i am, but in who He is. i've learned how to put aside my constant need for a relationship, and be comfortable either way things are in a season of my life. i am definitely learning what it means to be independent, and i am learning how to be a positive influence on those around me.

but with progress comes room to grow. i definitely need to learn to keep my mouth shut, because even when you don't ask for it, people will give you their opinion and their "wisdom" on a topic. and i need to learn to only speak things to those people whose opinions i actually value. i need to learn to moderate my emotions, instead of bottling them on the inside until i crumble (like i did last night). i definitely need to learn to quiet my flesh when trying to hear the Lord, and i need to learn how to be an even better influence on those around me.

and so this is where this entry finds me. this week has pushed me past my previous limits, and tomorrow and next week will push me past these newfound limits, and God is just trying to show me that He is faithful and that i can cling to His hand. i'm restoring that lost trust in people, and He is restoring faith in even the worst of criminals. my trust in Him and His love is growing everyday, and i know He will not leave me or forsake me. and this is definitely progress in the right direction.

maybe this whole going crazy being pushed to my limits will turn out to be a good thing after all :)